Sat. Nov 27th, 2021

Addiction Recovery Jokes Can Help Address Past Substance Abuse

Addiction is a devastating disease that we’re still learning about. Whereas most other diseases don’t change a person on such a profound, intimate level, addiction robs people of their physical health while turning them into shells of their former selves.

More specifically, it causes major deterioration of a person’s overall health and wellness by weakening the immune system, inhibiting the proper functioning of many bodily processes, and often damages specific organs and bodily systems with some of the damage incurred over the course of addiction being irreparable.

Additionally, the development of a substance abuse habit inevitably causes financial problems, a decline in work performance and attendance that often leads to the loss of one’s job, damage to or destruction of important relationships, and alters a person’s psychology in a way that affects their ability to consider the consequences of their continued substance abuse.

Jokes Reveal Lighter Side of Addiction, Recovery

Whether you’re battling with addiction or you have a loved one suffering from addiction, it’s a disease that causes great destruction, rippling through the lives of the addict and virtually everyone around him or her. Fortunately, there are resources available for people with addiction that have been effective at countering the destructive influence of this disease. This gives alcoholics and addicts with a means of getting their lives back.

It’s not an easy journey, but the important thing is that it’s possible. And while most people associate addiction recovery with the clinical programs offered at alcohol and drug rehabs across the country, there are millions of people who have found great success in recovery by joining twelve-step programs where they’re able to overcome their addictions while seeing the lighter side of their situations.

Alcoholics Anonymous, Storytelling & Humor

There are many different twelve-step programs that exist today, but Alcoholics Anonymous is the first, original twelve-step support group. It was created in 1929 by a man named Bill Wilson who had tried many of the existing support groups available at the time and found them to be lacking in one way or another.

Wanting to create a method of achieving mental, physical, and especially spiritual recovery, Wilson developed Alcoholics Anonymous and its renowned Twelve Steps with friend Dr. Bob Smith and the group grew rapidly. Today, Alcoholics Anonymous—and its numerous sister groups—is known to have helped millions and millions of people get sober.

One of the unique things about support groups like Alcoholics Anonymous is that it encourages people to share their experiences and perspectives with others who have experienced similar things over the course of their addictions. In fact, storytelling is a major tenet of twelve-step groups in that it helps people to vent their thoughts and feelings, liberating some of the guilt, frustration, and anxiety they might be feeling. When others share stories similar to one’s own, it makes people feel much better and become better able to take things a bit more lightly.

Trying Not to Take Addiction Too Seriously

Being in the throes of active addiction is surely not a laughing matter. It’s an alienating disease that destroys health, relationships, careers, opportunities, and so on. However, once a person has overcome an addiction and progressed to the point of sustained sobriety, it’s a good idea to try to find relief by injecting a little humor into the situation. Addiction recovery jokes can help people face their past and put it into perspective.

Again, addiction may seem like the last thing that one would want to laugh about, but being able to find a little humor is healthy and keeps a person from dwelling on the negative. Therefore, the following are some tasteful addiction recovery jokes, quips, and wisecracks about addiction and substance abuse. These can be used to add some levity to one’s situation and feel better about the past.

“Cocaine is never a solution. Unless you dissolve it in water, of course.”

A boy asks his grandmother, “Granny, have you seen a bottle of pills? It says ‘LSD’ on the bottle.” The grandmother replies, “To hell with the pills… Have you seen the dragon in the kitchen?”


“I suppose I was,” says the man to his wife. “How did you know?”


“You left your wheelchair at the pub.”

“I’ve always been the black sheep of my family. When I joined Alcoholics Anonymous, I found the rest of the herd.”

“What’s my beauty secret, you ask? I’ll tell you: Sobriety.”

“Sometimes I wrestle with my demons. Other times, we just snuggle.”

“I’ve got 99 problems, and I’m all of them.”

“If it’s called ‘Alcoholics Anonymous’, why do you start by telling everyone your name?”

It’s the end of the night at the pub and the last customer has just closed out his tab. He’s completely plastered and struggles to even make it out the door. Even though the man lives just a few hundred feet away, he finds himself crawling down the sidewalk to his home. He makes it inside, literally drags himself up the stairs and into his bed, and passes out. A few hours later, he’s woken from his drunken stupor by his wife who says, “You were pretty hammered last night, weren’t you?”


Due to increasing product liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the FDA’s suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers:

  • WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you definitely are not.
  • WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a douche.
  • WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again.
  • WARNING: Consumption of alcohol has been known to cause people to begin thaying shings like thish.
  • WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that you ex-lover is dying for your phone call at four o’clock in the morning.
  • WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what happened to your pants.
  • WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is likely to make you think you’re flirting with the opposite sex when you’re actually borderline-yelling at and spitting on them.


Just choose life…and laugh a little!


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