Operation Clean Recovery

The Here and Now

Sometimes the good Lord speaks to me. He did the other night while coming out from a dream. I’m waking up – soaking wet a fever and I can’t breathe…. I’ve got to tell you all something, I’ve been pretty sick. It came back yesterday for a minute, a small seizure followed by an episode […]

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The First Time a Gun was Pulled on Me by a “Treatment Professional” 

When I was getting high I was never a ‘tough guy.’ I never ‘ran the streets.’ I never ‘ran shit’ in Camden, New Jersey. I had foster homes for abused children. I had a needle in my arm the whole time and it got so bad I would occasionally steal their Adderal and snort it […]

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To the Children of Addiction and Alcoholism

To the Children of Addiction and Alcoholism, The most important thing I want to tell you is that none of this, absolutely none of this is your fault. As a father I never chose drugs over my son, in fact that is what defines me as someone with this disease of addiction: I have lost […]

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To the Drug Dealer

To the Drug Dealer, I know first and foremost there are two types of you – the small time dealer who deals to support his habit and the waste of life who deals to support his undeserved lifestyle. Firstly, to the waste of human life: The t-shirts that say “shoot your local heroin dealer,” were […]

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To the Addict Who Still Suffers

To the addict who still suffers, I was once where you are; unable to stop. I would watch everyone grow up around me. Buy houses, complete goals, raise children, laugh and love. I would drive by restaurants and watch people sharing a dinner outside and they would smile and converse with one another and I’d […]

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Sticks and Stones

  Written by Saul Kane Somewhere in 1986, my dad took the ape bars off my blue banana seated Schwinn bike replacing them with BMX style handle bars, he took off that banana seat also and replaced it with a BMX style seat – then he spray painted the whole bike black. I wanted a […]

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12 Steps in 30 Days Step 3

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12 Steps in 30 Days Step 2

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Saul Kane: How in the Hell Did He Get Here?

A Biography of Sorts, not Shorts Prior to his own personal recovery, Saul found himself battling his way through daily life. Unable to properly gain control of any one piece of his life, he found substances that would mask the pain for short intervals. Suffering from his own consequences of addiction, Saul Kane was faced […]

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12 Steps in 30 Days Step One Volume 1

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Addiction Heroin Jay’s Story

Gods Place in Addiction & Recovery

The Road to Recovery w/ Carpy Diem 10/29/2017

Cycle An Addiction Story

Neurobiology of Addiction by Bertha K Madras, PhD

Manders’ – Finding Comfort